one human family.

There are moments in my life when I pause to breathe and to give thanks.  Moments that feels so right, not for any one reason or because of any one person, but just an over all lovely feeling.  Tonight I've been feeling like that. I spent my day relaxing and being fairly efficient.  I went grocery shopping where I caught the eye of the attractive deli guy and asked a complete stranger for her advice on making Thanksgiving stuffing.  She was more than happy to share her tips ... "remember to put half an orange in your turkey!" she shouted at me from half way down the isle after we parted ways.  People are so friendly here.

Tonight I was intending to go swing dancing with a friend from work and some guys we met speed dating (another story for another day)... although I was really apprehensive about going and was trying to think up excuses to get out of it.  Dancing is just one of those things that I never feel comfortable doing... but it all worked out because my friend had to bail anyway.  I sat in my kitchen for a moment arguing with myself.  I could stay home and relax, but I've done that for the past 2 nights, I need some human interaction.

I had met a friend at the garden a while back - an older British man, William, who is a doctor and upright bass player - he invited me out to play with his group sometime.  They played every Tuesday and were very casual (meaning they wouldn't care if there were 2 upright basses).  I had his number written on a napkin and so with my rediscovered desire to make friends, I called him.  It was so great.  He invited me for dinner before hand with his lovely wife and Will.  Will is a meat farmer and band nerd.  We had met over the summer on several occasions through the garden or farmers markets.  Nice guy.

Dinner in itself was a very North Carolina-esk experience.  First of all, getting directions went like this:  "take the road all the way through town, when the road hits a straight-a-way make your first left by the vegetable stand.  the house number won't help you." So, I followed directions and low and behold I found it!  It was the only house down this road - a big brown log house.  Kids were running in and out, one of them let me in even though they'd never seen me before, and so I welcomed myself in meekly saying "hello?" looking for anyone else in the home (still seeking confirmation that I was in deed at the right house).  The house was great - so comfy and lived in.  It reminded me of what an old farm house would look like - cast iron stove and all.  I did find William and he led me in deeper into his home.  I met his wife, Susie, who seemed to be the perfect North Carolina farm wife.  She is short, her back is slightly hunched (from too many years of hard work, I suppose) and she mumbles a little when she speaks.  She made homemade tomato soup, biscuits, salad... all from scratch, of course.  We sat down and ate and, like all good Southern women she forced more food down a person then you'd ever expect.  "Will needs more soup."  It was a statement, not a question, so Will got more soup.  She sent about a dozen biscuits to the neighbors and we still had plenty for us.  I love that culture.  Everything was delicious and it was the community that I've craving so much since I moved out here.

I follow Will and William in my car out to the depths of the hills to play music.  It gets dark real quick out here, but it is so peaceful.  A guy in a really big pick-up truck is there to unlock the community center for us and we go on in.  Its a small group of musicians, but we sit in a round and play old traditional bluegrassy tunes for a few hours.  There is something about music that instantly creates community.  I entered the room as a stranger, but by the end we had a great time and were planning our next meeting.  There's nothing else quite like it. When we leave it is raining - hard.  I'm still not used to real rain storms... especially not at the end of November.  But we hurry and get our gear in our cars and take off.  I left before everyone else and I definitely had a moment when I realized that this could turn out really bad.  I am in the middle of nowhere, as far as I know, in the midst of a bad rain storm and all by myself.  Luckily my memory serves me well and I successfully make it back to the main road and home safely... even if I had gotten lost I took comfort in knowing that Will and William would be taking the same road back to town and would run across me and my car eventually.

I think what I love so much about moments like tonight is just being witness to the innate kindness that lies within all humans.  It reminds me that we are all one human family and we have to take care of one another.

So this thanksgiving I am thankful for my family.

Just getting started.

My move to Asheville NC happened on a whim nine months ago.  I left my beautiful home state of Colorado in hopes of finding adventure and harvesting courage to find myself.  I had just embarked on an epic 10 week adventure across Europe with one of my favorite people and it really opened my eyes to see how big the world is, how much diversity exists and how much there is to learn about this great big beautiful world around us.  Coming home I think I had a bit of "reverse culture shock" and as I assimilated back into my American ways I couldn't help but notice how small my world view was before I traveled.  All I had known was Colorado.  I had lived my whole life within 50 miles of where I was born.  It was great in someways, but I was 24 at the time, I needed to grow up a little bit, come into myself, become my own woman, fall on my face and pick myself back up.  And what better place than Asheville, North Carolina.

Choosing where to move took some time.  It was such an exciting time with endless possibilities - being a nurse I felt confident that I could find work anywhere in the States.  The Pacific Northwest was a big possibility.  So much so that my sisters and I took a trip to Portland and Olympia to scope it out.  I am so not cool enough for Portland.  Than a friend suggested that I check out Asheville.  He had a few friends here who loved it and he thought I would fit in nicely.  I emailed one of the girls and everything fell into place.  As it turned out she needed to sublet her room in this little house with 2 other girls and wanted to get rid of a mattress.  The hospital in town had an opening that felt tailored just for me so I got hired right away.  AND, icing on the cake, my favorite musician was playing the Orange Peel in exactly 2 weeks - just enough time to pack my bags and say good bye.

Ugh, saying goodbye was the hardest part.  I don't think I'll ever forget it. I packed my car chalk full (upright bass and all) the night before so that at 6am I could get cruising.  Seeing as it was mid February (Feb 13th, to be exact) my goal was to get to the St. Louis area before dark.  I rented some audio books and made some mix CDs and I cried my way across Kansas.

an idea of how stuffed my car was

the most exciting part of Kansas

coming into St. Louis

(I'm such a nerd that I listened to  Huck Finn as a I crossed the Mississippi River!)

I stayed the night in St. Louis.  Took myself out to BBQ then sat in the hot tub at the hotel and congratulated myself for feeling so independent.  I got on the road early again the next day because tomorrows goal was to make it to the east side of Nashville TN.  Once I got out of Missouri and into Kentucky things were starting to change.  The snow was fading, the grass was turning back to green, and oh-my-gosh Confederate flags were flying.  Todo, we're not in the West anymore.  I remember being not too far from the Tennessee border but I started getting nervous about my gas situation so I pulled off at the next exit that had a filling station.  I felt like I had drove onto a movie scene.  Back woods, old-school gas pumps, not a soul in site except me and the toothless woman behind the counter.  I could not hardly understand what she was saying her accent was so thick.  I mostly just handed her some money, smiled and said thank you, trying not to come across as rude for not small talking.  Oh Lord, what have I got myself into??

Nashville

Being as I've been stuck in the car for 2 full days I'm exhausted and I have no idea what day of the week it is.  I was so honestly reminded of the date when I took myself out to dinner at the Cracker Barrel.  I kid you not I was THE ONLY single person in the joint amongst about a hundred lovey-dovey couples. It is freaking Valentines Day and I got sympathy muffins from my waiter (no joke).   I called my friend and we had a good laugh about it, but that didn't ease that fact that I am so completely alone in my journey and the caliber of what I was doing finally hit me.  I ate quickly, bought myself a valentines day "date", went back to the hotel and cried while I watched chick flicks on the huge screen TV in the giant comfy king-sized bed.

my Valentines day "date"

I took off from Nashville a little later in the morning for my 3rd and final day of driving.  Only about 5 hours left until I reach my new home and it was such a beautiful drive.  Coming out of Knoxville you enter the Blue Ridge Mountains and you start seeing signs for Asheville!!

the first sign! 

Mountains are so comforting

On the way down the last hill into Asheville I am getting so excited!  24 hours worth of driving, 1400 miles behind me, and here I am, 20 miles away from an epic life changing adventure.  And I get PULLED OVER.  Dammit.  Well, the cop was nice enough. He took me back to sit in the front seat of his car for a minute and he asked me a bunch of questions (ie have you ever had a ticket before?  what do you do for a living?... Cops like Nurses :)  Thankfully he let me off with a warning saying that I would need the cash for my move and as a "welcome to Buncombe county" present.  Hooray!

I get in touch with Jesse, one of my new roommates, to try to meet for coffee somewhere as a "quasi interview/ make sure I'm not a creeper" before I go ahead and move all my stuff in.  We never actually found a place that was open, so we just went to the house.  She figured a validation from my friend Jenny was enough.  The house is cute and the girls are nice.  I'm SO glad to be here.

Cute house  

Once I get there I have just enough time to introduce myself,  unload my stuff and get ready for the Josh Ritter concert tonight!!  I am lucky enough to move to a new town where I already know people.  Did I mention that another friend had literally just bought a house in Asheville as I was filling out my application for my job.  She called me up and was all "hey- I heard you were looking for a place to move.  You should move to Asheville because I just bought a house there"  and I was like "get out of town, I just submitted an application to the hospital in Asheville".  Further confirmation that I made the right choice.

Anyway, the ladies picked me up at my new house and off we went to paint the town red on night #1.

Josh Ritter is my pretend boyfriend

Well, this is the story of the journey to the REAL journey:  my personal path of realizing my own potential and my own strength as a woman.  This is going to be a long road because I have A LONG way to go.  I have learned that writing/journaling is very meditative and therapeutic for me (hence the blog).  I have already learned to much about myself and grown and changed in ways that are only possible when you do something crazy like pack your car and move across the country, But here I am, nine months out and I'm just getting started.