I cannot wait to grow up.  Isn’t that horrible?  I’m 27.  Supposedly some of the best years of my life, and yet all I can do is dream about the future. I cannot wait! I have such a clear vision of what I want my life to be and I am stuck in limbo.  

I have a great guy.  98% of the time I’m sure he’s THE ONE.  The 2% is usually when I’m cranky and overwhelmed by life. I’m so glad that I’ve probably found the one - that feels really good, but it feels like limbo because we aren’t actively working towards marriage.  We live together, which is great, and we talk about the future a lot, but no outright plans to get hitched anytime soon.  

We live in a cute little condo that he owns. It’s fine for right now. He’s been great about letting me make my mark, but I know that this home is not forever (or even for awhile) so I’m hesitant to really settle in.  And it has no garden, and having a garden is #1 in my future plans.

I’m taking a Master Gardener class right now, mostly because I can, but its not helping to soothe my longing for the future.  I’m getting all these great ideas and nuggets of knowledge that I can’t wait to apply, but yet again I will have a mobile container garden this year. I can’t wait for my garden to be rooted in the earth. 

I can’t wait to buy a house. I know it comes with its own set of challenges, but to be able to benefit from the work you put into a place would be fantastic. To see the worth in upgrading/painting/etc would be a welcomed change from my transient haphazard lifestyle... and yet I’m very excited that we’re talking about a year of Travel Nursing.

Right now I am too busy to do all the things I want to do. So much of life is work and I don’t see how I could possibly be happy working full time for the rest of my life.  I think I should diversify - have more than one job.  But then I wonder if I would be stretched too thin.  Really all I want to do is take care of my home, my family, my garden, and make everything from scratch, maybe gets some chickens.  But honestly, I’m just not sure I’ll ever be able to do that.  Money is such an issue. I hate that Colorado is getting so expensive. I hate that our economy has made it so a normal family must of two working parents to make ends meet. 

So there you have it.  My head it eternally in the future.  All I can do is to do my best to occupy myself in the present and breathe.